Your Weekly Update On The Hottest Reality TV
This week was full of the drama, and we are loving it! With all new episodes of Vanderpump Rules, Real Housewives, and Keeping Up With The Kardashians, we've got you covered for all that you may have missed!
Keeping Up With The Kardashians, Season 18, Episode 3
We always knew that Kris Jenner was a bit of a sucker for flirting, but it was taken to an all new level of awkward when the momager couldn't stop talking about her sex life at a lunch with her daughters.
And if that isn't enough to make you cringe, she then went on to try so hard to set Khloé Kardashian up with various good looking fit men.
Khloé was very keen on shutting it down, saying she was "closed for business". You know it's bad when your mom is getting more action than you are.
We then move on to Scott Disick practising for an appearance, while getting help from Kim Kardashian. Kim uses the word "acronyms", and Scott freaked out. After all that time spent with Kourtney Kardashian, I'm not sure he's used to words that long.
Scott and Kim attend an acting class to help Scott with his appearance, and it's very clear Kim never sat with the theatre kids in the cafeteria in High School. The weirdness was too much for her, which is strange considering who her husband is.
Khloé talks about her path of self healing, freezing her eggs, and being completely turned off from the idea of men. Same, girl. Same.
Scott then went on to absolutely kill it at the conference, while we see Khloé and Malika Haqq get a phone call that Corey was seen with a red head at a hotel.
The red head turns out to be none other than Kris Jenner, which was totally not predictable at all. *Ahem*.
Next week we'll get an inside look (literally) at Kylie, as she undergoes eye surgery. Plus, Khloé grapples with the idea of sending off baby True to be with her daddy in Cleveland.
Real Housewives Of New York, Season 12, Episode 2
Make way for the ladies of New York! Specifically for Leah's hat. Can we all agree that some '90s trends should stay there, especially a mesh, black bucket hat? Burn it with fire.
The drama starts off hot with the ladies shook over... tattoos? Really? Anyways, I guess the ladies were completely overwhelmed at the idea that Leah McSweeney got a lower back tattoo of her name in her teens.
Sonja Morgan so eloquently put it as why would anyone "self- defecate" their body, and I'm not sure if she actually knows what that means, but hey, it's too good of a mistake to correct her.
The tattoo talk continues into dinner, when Dorinda Medley and Leah get into it. Dorinda attempted to apologize for some less than flattering comments, but her tone made it sound hostile and not super friendly.
Speaking of icy cold, can we just admire the subtlety of shade Ramona passed off to Luann DeLesseps? All the other ladies staying at Ramona's mansion in the Hampton's got a beautiful bedroom with their own bathroom.
For Luann, we'll just stick her in the basement, or as Ramona calls it, the "lower level". Ramona tried to pass it off as a "private level", but let's be honest, we're putting the Countess back in her cage.
All in all, this episode was a way for us to get to know the new girl Leah. Welcome to the middle-aged crazy parade!
Vanderpump Rules Season 8, Episode 14
This week, Vanderpump Rules gave us so many cringe-worthy moments!
The Witches of Weho meet up at Villa Blanca to talk about their wine ventures, clearly wishing they were anywhere else but seated together at that table, particularly Stassi Schroeder.
Kristin Doute finds out Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney are getting married in Las Vegas, and she wasn't invited. No one else is surprised about that, except for her.
Meanwhile, Dayna Kathan and Brett Caprioni decide that it would be a great idea to go on a date, because why would it be awkward that Brett's BFF is Dayna's ex?
After Dayna and Brett's lunch date, Scheana Shay makes it very clear she's not jealous. That would never happen. Sheana is known for being the least clingy... okay so maybe she's a little jealous.
Later, Stassi's main man, Beau Clark invited Schwartz and Katie to help decide on a ring. He finally is working up to proposing to our favourite psychopath! His plan involves a graveyard, ghost hunting, and magic. Isn't that what everyone does? Are those crickets I hear?
That night, Stassi and Beau have dinner. It gets extremely awkward when Stassie brings up the fact that while she doesn't want to give him an ultimatum, she wants a ring on that finger.
We're all squirming in our seats, because she's crying about something she literally just has to wait a week for.
Finally, Dayna throws a birthday bash for herself, calls out Sheana for being shady, Sheana cries, Kristin cries, Brett tries to make out with Lisa Vanderpump, cake get's smeared on everyone, and finally Brett decides to make out with Dayna. Totally normal night.
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let them eat cake! a few more from my bday party on last nights ep. sharing a birthday with my mom is one of the greatest honors of my life. this was the first year i really had a blast since she was still here. it was fun as f*ck to rewatch! . swipe all the way right for a major throwback of our second bday together. i love hearing her voice. not shown @brkeever trying to steal my sh*t per usual.
Don't miss next week, where we get to see a Las Vegas wedding, and more juicy moments with Brett and Dayna!